Jeffrey knows the words
By Laurence McKeown
People who know I am involved with Féile an Phobail (West Belfast
Community Festival) often enquire as to why the committee does
not invite Daniel O'Donnell to come and play at the Féile.
Now, for those who do not know of Daniel (is there such a
person?), Daniel is the biggest thing to come out of Ireland in
recent years. Even the stick over Charlie Haughey receiving money
from Ben Dunne will long be forgotten while the sweet sound of
Daniel is still heard across the airwaves. That means he's booked
solid for about the next five years. Sure hasn't Tony tried
without success to get him to Féile an Phobail?
I don't like his kind of music but do admit to having met Daniel
and he does genuinely seem to be a nice guy. He's very down to
earth and he is loved in his native Donegal where he helps
promote local community events and enterprises where he can.
To the best of my knowledge Daniel has never uttered a political
word in his life. Even on the Mrs Merton show he was all grave
and good manners and when he spoke the f... word (fart, not the
other one) it seemed somehow in good taste.
It was with some surprise therefore that his name came up in
company the other evening while we were discussing the 12th,
Orange parades, Garvaghy and little Mo. ``Isn't yer man a button
for Daniel O'Donnell?'' someone said. Conversation stopped for a
few moments as we puzzled on this profound and possibly
controversial comment. ``Jeffrey Donaldson, he's a button for
Daniel O'Donnell, isn't he?'' To say that there wasn't an
immediate display of assent would be somewhat of an
understatement. I know that my immediate reaction was to refute
such an insinuation about an innocent harmless lad from Donegal.
But as I began to visualise the two I thought that, yes, given
certain conditions I could see a similarity. For instance, the
apparent stiffness around the region of the neck. If Daniel was
to be told tomorrow that he had broken his neck and that if he
was to move his head it would fall off then he could well adopt a
posture where one could say there was a likeness with Jeffrey.
Secondly, the smile (Daniel's that is, as if you didn't know). If
Daniel was to be told that the songs of Willie McCrea had
superseded his own in the charts, and if a photograph was to be
taken of him immediately after that news was broken to him, yes,
I concede, there could well be a likeness. I was amazed in fact
to hear Barry Cowan on Radio Ulster on Sunday refer to the
similarities between the two. Could it be that a PR job is being
done on behalf of Jeffrey? Watch Mrs Merton for confirmation of
this.
What Daniel lacks, however, is the ability to foretell the
future. I listened to Jeffrey speak prior to the Portadown
parade, when a decision about Garvaghy had still not been
announced, and he spoke of how, regardless of what decision was
made, any protests should be peaceful ones.
Readers of this column will know that I predicted that Orange
feet would march on Garvaghy Road, though that was more an
educated guess than anything else and I was quite prepared to eat
my words - which is not uncommon. However, speaking to the media
that day Jeffrey spoke with an air of confidence and why
shouldn't he? He already knew what the decision was to be. The
rest of us were running around, will they, won't they, and all
the time the boul Jeffrey knew the outcome. Why didn't we just
ask him? Was there ever a doubt? Had we actually come to believe
that maybe the link between unionism, the Orange Order, the RUC,
the state and the British government was not as strong as it once
had been?
Now that's the sort of romantic, idealistic notion that Daniel
sings about. Jeffrey is in a different game. And it's easy to
make good PR and reap in the winnings when you know how the chips
are going to fall.
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