Christmas visions
Neil Forde's guide through the yuletide film maze
Every Christmas thousands of people who would be rare visitors to
the land of surround-sound and popcorn make the journey to their
local cinema.
The film industry in anticipation of this glut of newcomers lays
on a litany of new films aimed especially at the family audience
and the happy couples who throng the cinema aisles. Don't worry
though, the usual diet of recreational violence, horror, science
fiction and cop thrillers is still on offer to those hardy film
fans.
So how do you plan your viewing choices in this difficult season?
It all depends on who you're with. Is it a family visit, your own
peer group, possibly a niece or nephew or both, a long-term
partner or some new flame you want to impress?
Family fun
Family fare in the cinema this Christmas is a three horse race
between John Goodman in The Borrowers, Disney's Hercules and
Spice Girls The Movie. We include the much hyped Spice Girls
because your young darlings are likely to wage an unrelentling
campaign to go.
Don't give in. Just think of how much merchandise you will have
to fork out for and remember how many times you had to listen to
variously dire renditions of When Two Become One.
Disney's Hercules is out for just the same reason. So it has to
be the Borrowers which seems to be a watchable morality tale.
Cops and Robbers
For those into the good cop/bad cop action movies, there is a
good choice on offer. The problem is how couples agree on
acceptable viewing fare in this difficult area.
Top of the list is LA Confidential with Kim Bassinger and Alex
Baldwin. It's a stylish thriller which racks up a significant
bodycount. This is not a film for couples still in the early days
of a relationship as some partners may not be able to stand the
inevitable slobbering over messers Baldwin and Bassinger. Watch
out for the appalling northern accent of one character.
Copland, starring Robert DeNiro, Ray Liotta and Sylvester
Stallone, is a difficult film to gauge but I have found that the
esteem some women hold Robert De Niro in means they will go to
see him open a matchbox. So this could be a good choice.
However, I don't think that even the attraction of John Travolta
will coerce your female partners to see John Wu's Face-Off which
is not really a film but rather a pastiche of shootings,
bombings, collisons and tag chases between Travolta and Cage.
Celtic Bonds
Tomorrow Never Dies is the latest James Bond creation and is very
watchable action flick for all the family. It's listed as over 12
with adult but you're never too young to start watching the
enjoyable rubbish that is Bond films. The fact that this latest
Bond is Pierce Brosnan dilutes somewhat the pro-British agenda of
the film. Forget Lazenby, Moore and Dalton. It's the Celtic Bonds
who come out tops.
Happy Horror
Always good for a diversion is a horror movie and this year's
surprise hit was Scream. Now from the same director we have I
Know What You Did Last Summer. The only problem is finding
someone to go with.
You won't have a problem finding accompaniment for the fourth
film in the Alien series such is the trans-gender pulling power
of Sigourney Weaver, star of Alien Resurrection.
Possibly the most Christmassy film on offer is the re-release of
Frank Capra's It's a Wonderful Life starring James Stewart. On
the surface this is a feelgood Christmas movie but it's real
message is an indictment of market capitalism and a reaffirmation
of the power of co-operative economics. Now this really is one
for all the family.
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